One day your uppance will come...

Beware the sports related blog ramble o' death.

I don't know why I'm a UT football fan. A part of me of says it was self-preservation since my wife bleeds orange and would not tolerate any other football fandom in the house. Another part says it's because they won the national championship the year I started watching them. And a more cynical part says it's because I must be a closet masochist.

I mean, seriously folks... UT, could you please play any worse on offense? Jon Crompton is, bless his heart, about as lost a young man as I have ever seen on a football field right now. He is not a leader, he is not a quarterback. He is a thrower (as in, throw in the towel.) As long as he's the QB, I don't see UT football going anywhere but home early, to have a nice cry. I hate to be harsh, because he's a kid and he doesn't get paid for this, but he has really been awful and it's getting WORSE instead of better. And don't get me started on Dave Clawson.

Phil Fulmer's days are probably numbered, whether you blame him or not. I cannot see the program and the fan base enduring another horrid season like '05, which is probably what this one will be. We still have SEC games with Georgia, who, despite being beat like a drum tonight by Alabama, will almost certainly beat us, Alabama (that one will probably be a huge loss), South Carolina (possible loss), Vandy (if we lose this again, Phil may be assassinated rather than fired), Mississipi State (we SHOULD win, but then we should have beat Auburn today too), and Kentucky (if we lose, I will euthanize myself.)

We could conceivably go 0 for the SEC, though in all likelihood, we will win at least two games, probably three, and possibly four in conference. If we didn't have Wyoming and Northern Illinois on the docket, I would say we might stand a slim chance of possibly losing every remaining game on the schedule (despite being in all our games into the 4th quarter so far, with the exception of Florida.) The SEC is a meatgrinder. But I'm probably just bitter, because we should really beat Kentucky and Mississippi State just by showing up.

Even if we beat NI, Wy, Ken, and Miss State, that still just FIVE total wins (thank you, whoever scheduled UAB). And those are by no means guaranteed victories. Granted we could ambush SC , but as bad as their offense was, ours is worse. Steve Spurrier has two poor QBs and we have one. At least he has numbers going for him.

We could also beat Vandy, but they are looking good so far, though they do tend to fold like a deck chair by the end of the season usually. Our problem is that I really don't see us doing much better with Crompton at the helm. I know they don't want to give up on the lad, but when do you say enough is enough and go with Stephens?

Anyway, I'm just a bitter Vols fan at the moment. And I have the right. I may bleed orange (though it's more Clemson orange), but the problem right now is that I bleed OFTEN.

Stupid Vols. Put me in at QB next time. You'd still lose, but at least you'd have a better excuse....

Ford hates me

So after much debate (and a small hiatus) I am back to reveal a terrible truth.

Ford hates me.

Viciously.

I have two Ford automobiles. Don't ask why. That's not the point. The critical point is that I hate them. Well, that sounds...ungrateful. Hmm, how can I say it in a less bitter fasion? I hate Fords in general and my two cars are good examples of why.

Well. That wasn't much better, I guess.

Too bad. Bite me, Ford.

Anyway, I have a Ford Taurus that doesn't run. I also have a Ford Contour that doesn't run. So I'm 0 for 2. Awesome. The Contour needs an alternator. The Taurus needs some lovin'. And a battery. And possibly other stuff. Who knows? A mechanic I ain't.

Anyways, you wouldn't think that an alternator is that hard to replace, right? Well, Ford in its infinite hatefulness decided to stick the alternator RIGHT UNDER THE ENGINE. Nowhere easy to get to. But that's not all. It's made so that the recommended way to remove the alternator is to REMOVE THE FRIGGIN' AXLE OFF THE CAR! Are you serious???

Ok, I do not have tons o' cash. Paying in excess of $300 to get an ALTERNATOR put on my car makes no sense to me (not to mention being economically unfeasible.) With the right tools and some know how, it should be an easy matter to remove the alternator oneself and install a new one. But no, Ford has decided that I must suffer.

Well, at least when we bought our van, we bought a Dodge. So take that, Ford.

And your little dog, too.